A Mostly Commentary Recap of the Amazing Race Season 21 Episode 1

I have an addiction to this show. I’m seriously into it. My palms get sweaty, I’m cursing at them for going the wrong way, or completely not seeing something that’s right there, and, yes, I have the ringtone to the theme. The 21st season started this Sunday, and of course, it was no different. I could tell from the introductions that there would be some annoying people on The Amazing Race, as there is every year, and certain teams that I might root for. Having annoying qualities, must be one of the criteria to be selected. At least 5 people couldn’t pronounce the word ‘Abacus’. #JUSTSAYIN

The kicker this time around, was that the first team to win the first leg and the last leg of the race would have a chance to win $2 million instead of $1 million. Better than winning an Express Pass? YES! Judging from the winners of this first leg, I kind of don’t want them to win the last leg though.

****Spoilers below****

Beloved Host, Phil: Same as usual. “I’m sorry to tell you that you are the last team to arrive, and you’ve been eliminated from the race.” He always says he’s sorry, but is he really?  – Obviously, this isn’t a spoiler.

The Twins: You’ve got that annoying partner who keeps yelling/whining at you to do something else because what you’re doing is wrong. Seriously? You aren’t the one up there playing ping pong with a Jr. Champion, are you? Yeah, shut the eff up and be supportive. Hopefully, you won’t be double the annoying in the future episodes, or I’m changing your name from The Twins, to The Annoying-ass Twins. They mispronounced abacus, but corrected themselves.. at the same time… because they’re twins.

Texas Football Player/Cheerleader Couple: Glad the cheerleader ate those frog Fallopian tubes pretty fast.. gag-faced, but she did it with no whining. You go! She did say ‘albacus’.

Semi-older Monster Trucker Couple: I kinda dig you. You learned the “read the whole clue” lesson early. Good. But damn, you ate double the amount of frog Fallopian tubes. That shit is a delicacy, yo. Also, I think my mom thinks I want some because after watching this episode, I kept asking her questions about it.

Chippendales Guys: Meh, although the Chippendales cuffs/collars thing was hilarious. “I’m here to party, but I wanna be formal, is what this says.” I don’t think they knew what an abacus was because they ran by that lady like 20 times, and mentioned something about “where do we find her — in the water?”

Douchey-looking Dating Divorcees: Uh.. that weird jiu jitsu choke move you did on your gf in the introduction.. just no. :/ They won 1st in the 1st race because some other team told them where the abacus lady was. Well, I don’t think that was an asshole move, since it IS a race, but I still don’t like them. Also, he said ‘why isn’t she using a calculater”. Also, I think he’s so full of shit.

Rockstars/Lawyer Guys: Saying abacus repeatedly doesn’t help you find the lady with the abacus. They also said “ke ai” not “kuai” I think.. and “wo ai ne” to their chinese cab driver ………….. ok then.

Goat Milk Farmers: One is whiny, one isn’t. Typical couple. Funny moment – Guy 1: “are you going to be like this for the entire flight?” Guy 2: “maybe” Guy 1: “Then, I’m going to find a sleeping pill somewhere.”

Couple (girl w/ prosthetic legs due to bacterial meningitis): They’re helpful, good people and they don’t regret giving the clue to the other couple who  beat them in a foot-race to first and the clue said it was a pitstop next. You’re still badass though..

Sporty All Girls Team Friends: One snorted.. hah.. no comment on them either, except they say ‘yeehaw’ a lot.. or was that the cheerleader?

6’6” and 5’1” Guy Buddy Teachers: quirky or trying to be quirky. Meh.

Lumberjack Guy and Doormat Fiance: You’re really letting him pick out your wedding dress? They had the best pronunciations of abacus: ahbasket and albacoss; Then they were led astray to the Bank of China instead of The Bund, the famous Shanghai waterfront.. What? Yeah, ok. Not sad you guys were first to go.

 
  • snapshotist

    Ugh. I hate that cabs have such a determining factor in winners and losers in the Amazing Race.